2-3-4 Friday
‘Seeking to spark the most potential
within you per word of any online newsletter’
1
thought
I was having a chat
recently with my therapist.
I hate people who slack!
They are so lazy!
Why can’t they buck up?
In that slow, therapist way, he said,
John, maybe sometimes you foist your high expectations of yourself onto others.
Ah.
That makes sense.
Sometimes we may find ourselves complaining about our colleagues or our bosses, wondering why they don’t buck up.
But sometimes, that may be due to our own unmet expectations of ourselves, rather than of others not meeting our expectations.
Because we are harsh with ourselves, we bring these expectations into our interactions with others, expecting them to raise their standard, to meet our standard.
Here’s one key thing.
Your friend/colleague/loved one is meeting his own standard.
Perhaps in his view, he’s already doing very well.
He’s focused on running his own race.
What’s the problem if they don’t meet yours? Why do you get so pissed at him?
What’s wrong?
In the eyes of your partner, you’re the
one with the problem. But in your eyes, he’s the one with the problem.
This mismatch of expectations often leaves us feeling terribly unhappy.
How then do we change this?
1 tip
Firstly, write down your expectations of your partner or colleague.
- In an ideal world what would he be doing?
- What is he not doing now?
- What are
you doing about it? Meaning, are you talking to him about it?
Secondly, talk to someone about your expectations. This can be a close friend, that will help you see if your expectations are reasonable.
1 talk
Sometimes it’s not that others can’t meet expectations. It’s that they are meeting their own expectations of themselves, but not yours.
John
Live Young,
Live Well - Work Your Love
Think others might benefit? I’m counting on you. Forward this on.