2-3-4 Friday 4 Feb

‘Seeking to spark the most potential within you per word of any online newsletter’

1 thought

I was recently at a group where we were discussing whether we should break up as a group. There was little growth that was being seen, and it looked like there was no real meaning for us to come together.

People spoke fervently about what the group meant to them.

When it came for me to speak, I chose to stay silent.

It is unusual.

It still is.

Staying silent is difficult. And not offering an opinion or a comment or a question, for those of us who are more outspoken, can often seem stupid.

After all, doesn’t the saying go,

There are no stupid questions.

The only stupid questions are those that aren’t asked.

Our societal shift towards extroversion has been well documented in Susan Cain’s book ‘Quiet’, where qualities showing extroversion tend to be celebrated in the workplace, whilst those quiet and introspective people end up being seen as not that helpful.

But sometimes the problem with adding more to a conversation is that it doesn’t necessarily add anything new.

One question Shane Parrish asks us to think about is:

What do you know about this problem that other people in the room don’t know?

Filter your comments through that next time, and you might find yourself raising the bar of what you say.

It doesn’t matter what other people’s standards are.

It matters what yours are.

1 talk

What do you know about this problem that other people in the room don’t know?

Shane Parrish, founder of fs.blog

1 tip

We’ve all been stuck in meetings that we don’t get much from.

Don’t put your colleague, or yourself through another one.

Talking is easy. Making the changes required is hard.

Another thing I find helpful is to use the chance to stay silent as a chance to observe colleagues or others in the room.

It often becomes an easier way to understand their position, how they communicate, what they dislike, and how to better work with them in future.

Even if you like speaking, I urge you to give this experiment a try.

Try staying silent for an entire meeting, only speaking at the last moment when they call for final comments.

You’ll be surprised at how much more people think you added.

John

Live Young, Live Well - Work Your Love

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