2-3-4 Friday: 31 Aug

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1 thought

2 weeks ago, Singapore’s fourth Prime Minister, Lawrence Wong gave his second National Day Rally speech.

A major highlight of his speech was here:

We say this in our national pledge. It starts with a simple but profound statement. “We the Citizens of Singapore”. It is not “I” or “me”. It is “we”.

To keep Singapore going, we must be a “We-First” society.

Some like political commentator Bertha Henson, remarked:

Halfway through watching the NDR, I turned to my Lego bricks to construct a mansion.

Some like independent candidate Jeremy Tan, said that the speech lacked “bitter medicine”.

Before it seems like I’m here to lampoon the government, I will first say, that when I initially heard the speech, I thought it struck the right chords (for me).

Clearly it didn’t for others. In a world that has increasingly tended towards strongmen, has Singapore gone soft?

Over the week, I was once again at Tong Yee’s classes on organizational development, and trying to understand why PM Wong was showing care, when it seemed like around the world, politicians were trying to show strength.

Why did PM Wong think an approach of care would work, when our world seemed to be in such troubled waters?

One perspective that was offered was that Singapore’s Government didn’t necessarily have all the answers, and that by encouraging solidarity, over individualism, it was showing that we could do things, better together.

This can sound cliche and weak.

But if we are honest, it is true that in times like these, trying to go it alone, can seem tempting. It’s what countries like the US have chosen.

You’re for me,

or against me.

And when we go into each micro unit, into the family, the communities around us, it is tempting to go at it alone.

Something I find incredible about Singapore, however artificial it might seem, is that there is a genuine investment in communal facilities, even if it might sometimes be politicized.

Go into every town in Singapore, and you would find a People’s Association Community Club, or Residents’ Network, where they organize activities such as:

1. Sports
2. Learning clubs
3. Children play activities

Even for me, every Sunday, it’s been easy for me to take the netball sessions played at a communal netball court for granted. People complain - oh the water cooler does not give cold water, but we tend to miss the fact that at least the facility is there, maintained, cleaned, and working.

Every Sunday, the netball meetup would break out into different groups to talk over dinner, and that is where life, advice, and even jobs are shared.

One of the hardest thing living in the U.K. was adapting to the lack of community there. There were odd bits here and there, but nothing that resembled a culture of community. Perhaps they were gated communities, and something I didn’t know where to look for.

But moving back, I now realise that care isn’t just something airy-fairy. 

Some think it doesn’t solve big problems like economic uncertainty, but Singapore seems to think it can.

1 talk

When societies begin to fragment, we are tempted to move increasingly to survival, with every man for himself.

Where we need to move is instead opposite, towards integration.

1 tip

Care prevents fragmentation.

As the world disintegrates into our deep primal selves, and we begin to focus on our own individual needs, we see society fragment.

Credit: Tong Yee

So wherever you are, what can you do to prevent this?

As individuals, if you can, show care towards a friend. Lend a kind hand. Buy them a drink, listen to them, sit with them, offer practical help.

I know much of this can be hard, especially when our lives are already this scarce on time, energy, and money.

Recently, I found myself hating to sit down and listen to people sob about their lives. I became allergic to it and just wanted to get away. It got so bad that when friends wanted to meet me, I would simply ignore the message. I wondered why it seemed like more people were asking more and more of me, without ever giving anything in return.

But one evening, it hit me that I had not seen the kindness from others in my life. It helped me to reframe caring for others as simply spreading on the kindness I had previously received.

Of course, as with everything, there is a balance. Don’t care for others if you’re feeling scarce, and if you’re feeling yourself tip over into scarcity, don’t try to be kind.

But as the world begins to fragment, in your own small way, bring people closer together by showing them some care.

The world could go to absolute shit, but you don’t have to be an asshole.

John

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