2-3-4 Friday
‘Seeking to spark the most potential within you per word of any online newsletter’
1 THOUGHT
I’ve been looking for a job. And I must confess, it’s been very difficult.
Checking your emails all the time, hoping employers will reach you. Sitting by your phone, and calling every missed call you have (only to realise that it’s another scam call). Sending out application after application.
As if it’s not difficult enough, I’m making it tougher for myself.
Why?
Because of how I listen to myself.
Maybe that’s you today. You’re trying to get somewhere in life. A pay-rise. A promotion. A new job. But no matter how hard you try, you don’t seem to get there.
Here might be the reason why. Your self-talk is undermining your success.
When I received another rejection from employers, I found myself saying to myself,
No one wants me! I’m useless! No one values the work I do!
Here’s something to think about. For all the well-meaning advice you hear from supportive friends and family, for all the inspirational messages you listen to, you still spend most of your time listening to yourself.
You might spend an hour listening to advice from a friend. Another hour hearing an inspirational YouTube video. The rest of the time, you’re with yourself.
That’s why moving beyond the automatic thought patterns that you listen to involves speaking to yourself more often. Don’t worry, you’re not crazy. But it’s about reframing what appears in your mind and does not build you up with something different.
For example, you may say:
- I can’t do that.
- I’m not good enough.
You can reframe that as:
- I can try.
- I am becoming better.
By speaking to yourself, rather than listening to yourself, you adjust the automatic boot up scripts that run every time you start your brain’s computer.
1 QUOTE
“Have you realized that most of your unhappiness in life is due to the fact that you are listening to yourself instead of talking to yourself?
Take those thoughts that come to you the moment you wake up in the morning. You have not originated them but they are talking to you, they bring back the problems of yesterday, etc. Somebody is talking.
Who is talking to you? Your self is talking to you.
- Martyn Lloyd Jones
1 TIP
Try this self-esteem raising tool. Draw two columns. On the left side, put down all the negative things you listen to about yourself.
- I’m not good at making friends
- I’m not handsome
- I’m not funny
On the right side, for every negative thing, write down threecounterarguments. It’s THREE! Not one. You better think twice whenever you say something negative to yourself!
1a. I’m great at making strong 1 on 1 relationships.
1b. I invest deeply in my friendships, going the distance to write letters to friends.
1c. I initiate meetups with people who matter to me.
Try that, you’ll be amazed at what you find.
John
liveyoungandwell.com - Work Your Love