2-3-4 Friday
‘Seeking to spark the most potential
within you per word of any online newsletter’
1
thought
Funny story. Recently I
went on a date with someone and confessed my feelings.
But not before I told her how pissed off I was with her being late.
I feel quite pissed, because you’ve been late 4 out of the 6 times we’ve met.
She rolls her eyes.
I didn’t know you were
counting.
In my mind, I
think,
Hell yeah, of course I’m counting!
Later she told me,
It feels like our dates are extended therapy sessions.
Ouch.
I can’t imagine this going on for longer.
Oops.
You wouldn’t want to date me.
There’s a lesson from this. (And it’s not that you shouldn’t date me.)
But it’s this.
When I spoke to my therapist about this, he led me to this idea of figuring out what the priority was.
Was it to change her or was it
because you cherish the relationship?
When you first start a relationship, any relationship, any interaction, people often go one of two ways.
- They put up with the shit people give them.
- They refuse to be a doormat and lay down the boundaries from the start.
As you can see, that may not always be the best thing to do. So I think it’s this.
It’s loving boundaries. It’s telling the truth, with love.
Across a bridge called grace.
You could tell me,
Hey John, you’re an asshole. (Which is quite true.)
And I tell you this because I don’t want you to end up losing more friends. (Which is loving)
But I want you to know that I still accept you as you
are.
Grace is a
difficult concept to wrap one’s head around because you don’t hear it much, except perhaps in Christian churches.
But if there’s one thing to grace, it’s this.
1 talk
It’s saying what may sound mean, and meaning what you say, but saying it in a loving way.
1 tip
You could use a bit more grace in your life.
Here’s how.
Each time you want to shoot your mouth, check yourself and ask,
How would I feel if someone said
that to me?
P.S.
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John
Live Young, Live Well - Work Your Love